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Sales Tales

Business Growth, Creating the Unprecedented, Getting What You Want Insight, Increase Performance, Leadership Training, Life Insight, Self Development0 comments

Peter was terrified to make the call.

You’d never guess that he would be scared to make the call. He was a good looking guy in his 30s. He had a lot going for him. He was engaged to Jill. They had met in college and fell in love and decided to make a life together. He had a great sales job with huge up side if he just made a few sales. Peter had made big promises of taking care of her and their soon to be family. But yet, there he was, sitting in his sales office staring at the phone. Horrifed.

What was it that made so cold calling so horrible. The recipients where strangers. Why did it matter to him that he would possibly be rejected by a stranger? If he would have gotten a call from someone he had never heard of before that went something like, “Hey, Peter, I found your name online, and I don’t want you to ever call me. I don’t want you to be in my life in any way,” and then that stranger hang up, would that be a big deal? No. Peter would have thought it was strange, maybe amusing and go on with his day. He might even tell the story of the funny thing that happened to him that day. “Some stranger that I’ve never heard of asked me to never call them. Isn’t that crazy?” But there he was, making up a story about that same stranger, and how he can’t go on with life if that person he doesn’t know has the chance to say no to him. Now it was a big deal. That really was crazy.

Peter had a flash of insight. He remembered how rude his fiance, Jill was to him the first time he met her. They were at a party with some common friends. Peter saw her and said something stupid like, “Red wine huh. I like red wine too.” His horror of saying something so stupid to a pretty girl he wanted to impressed was only made worse when this same pretty girl just smirked, and without a word turned her back to him to talk to her group of friends. Peter thought for sure that this pretty stranger hated him with all her heart. He would have left the party and run for safety if he hadn’t been stuck there, because he got a ride with a friend that was not about to leave. Peter spent the next few forced to stay in the small quarters of the party which kept him in eyesight of this girl that had now become a forbidden goddess in his mind. He kept himself in agony from going over again and again in his mind what he should have said instead of the Dumb and Dumber line he mumbled.

Then the story he made up in his mind about his world crumbled. This same goddess came up to him as he sat on the sofa in the corner and spoke. “Sorry I was so weird. I felt so self-conscious I couldn’t say anything. I have had two glasses of that red wine. I think I have some liquid courage. Anyway, my friends say you’re really nice so I just wanted to say sorry for being weird.”And with that opening, Peter ran with it. Three years later, there they were engaged.

Peter was sure Jill hated him, but it was just her own fears he was feeling, not him at all. Just as Peter was only thinking about himself in that interaction, Jill was only thinking about herself too. When that happens both people miss each other. Peter was started to see a pattern. The more he paid attention the more he realized people were not thinking about him at all. They were too busy thinking about themselves. This was reliving though, because so much of Peter’s energy was worried about what people thought of him. If they didn’t think of him at all it freed him to pursue his goals and make good his promises, or in this case, make some cold calls.

Could cold calling be the same scenario as the first encounter with Jill that could end just as well? Peter thought yes. With the new found story in his mind that served him much better he picked up that phone and called the first number. He got hung up on. With a smirk he said out loud, “No problem, with a few glasses of wine you’ll be back.” And he picked up the phone and called again.

How faking confidence works

Business Growth, Creating the Unprecedented, Increase Performance, Leadership Training, Life Insight, power of words, Sales, Self Development, Your Success Switch0 comments

Don’t resist how people tend to act. Resistance will just dig you deeper into a rut. But you can use people’s automatic behaviors to your advantage.

People tend to follow confidence, because they assume a confident person is competent. People tend to distrust timid people, because they assume the timid person is incompetent.

I’m in sales. I’ve seen it over and over again. The is a salesperson that is heads and shoulders above the rest of her peers in sales. When I’ve had the chance to get to know them, I find out that they are not better then the #2 guy, they just get people to say yes through their confident and direct asking for what they want and assurances they will deliver what their client wants. The really good sales people always find a way to deliver their promises! The bad ones with confidence usually don’t last in the business, because their deception eventually catches up.

There is certainly value in being prepared. And try this on for a week or so. Try acting confident. Try out being 100% sure that you will deliver (even if you are a smarty and can think of 100 ways that can go wrong, just try it out). Try out declaring that others can count on you, because you will do what ever it takes to help your people win! I think you’ll find you will have a lot more people following and saying yes to your requests.

Try it out. I will give you a 100% old-life back guarantee if it doesn’t work.

– Jevon

PerraLoans.com

Reverse Engineering Happiness/Success

Business Growth, Creating the Unprecedented, Life Insight, power of words, Reinvent Yourself, Sales, Self Development, words0 comments

The quickest way to happiness is changing the words you use.

This is hard to imagine at first, but I’ve found it to be true. Out of the mouth comes the overflow of the heart, revealing what you truly believe. I think most can grasp that concept. If someone is consistently speaking hateful words you can deduce they are hurting and fearful inside. Here’s a secret. We can reverse engineer that same process. Reverse engineering the perfect life works by using the words first and letting your heart catch up.

The words we say are the easiest to dismiss as powerful since they are so easy to produce. It’s easy to say the words, “I love you” or say the words “I hate you”. The affect they have on the inside is profoundly different though. What are the words you use without thinking? Don Miguel Ruiz’s The Four Agreements talks about being impeccable with your words is the most important task. When we fill our conversation to ourself and others with lots of grace and understanding and love our life suddenly is full of grace and understanding and love. When we fill our conversation to ourself with judgment and ridicule and punishment our life becomes a self made hell.

I do real estate mortgages for work. Mortgages now a days are very difficult since there is a lot of moving parts and regulation. Recently a purchase loan was made very late from other people’s mistakes. The monetary penalty of being late was taken on by me though,  not the consumers that caused the delay. At that point I could have used a number of words to talk to myself and others. My words determine my experience in the moment. “This is not my fault. This was their mistake. They should have paid the penalty, not me. This/they/it is ridiculous. I am so frustrated/angry/depressed/stressed!” These words bring me a bad experience. I am committed to love my life and love others the best I can. From that commitment to myself I was able to use different words. “I can learn from this experience to set better expectations with my clients. The buyers are not the experts, I am. I am becoming a better lender every day from these perfect lessons. I am so thankful that this extra expense doesn’t hinder my way of life. I have an abundance. I am going to do what it takes to make this tricky deal a good experience for my employees and clients.” Even when I write those words I feel my mood shift to a much lighter state from the previous judgmental and negative state. It feels so much better. And since both sides can be equally as true, why not choose the one that feels the best?

Experiment with this. Look for the authentic ways to talk about your life in a positive way and watch your experience of your life lighten and become instantly more enjoyable. The more you enjoy your life and yourself the more enjoyable you will be to others. The more enjoyable you are to others, the more favor you will have in your world. The more favor you have, the easier you will get all you want. It starts with your words though. Easy.

 

How to choose an exciting new year.

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The father of following your bliss, Joseph Campbell said, “We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.”

Many of us have suffered loss and disappointment this last year, or maybe in this life so far. I am proposing an idea that you can let all that pain go if you choose. I can imagine that seems rude or insensitive to suggest that you can choose to let the pain from your past go. You may be thinking, “I can’t just let go of this pain. My loss happened TO me. I didn’t control that. I can’t make it go away. I can’t change it.”

You are right. And please consider, could it be possible that the disappointment and loss that we have suffered can be exactly the way it is AND we choose to live life today as if we have never been hurt and disappointed even though we have. Maybe you can relate, I have thought that if my loss, disappointment, failure or whatever hadn’t happened, then I would be able to be happy, successful, whatever. This belief is the problem.

This last year was an intense year for me. Along with the normal challenges of money and career, my grandfather and my close first cousin that was the same age as passed away. I planned for my loved ones to be successful, healthy and happy. Then they weren’t. Sometimes this is enough to derail an entire life. Have you ever thought you couldn’t openly be happy and successful because someone else you care about was miserable?

Campbell talks about letting go the “life we have planned”. This is an essential element of highly effective people and also of happy people. It’s letting the life you have be ok and then going for the life you prefer. You have to let go what you thought you wanted when you can no longer have it. Only after you let go of a past you can’t change anyway do you free yourself up to create and embrace a future that you would prefer.

Here is my new years wish for you. I wish and pray that you are able to be independent of the good or the bad from your past. Use your past as lessons to make better decisions today. And don’t use your past as an excuse that you can no longer go for what you want because you have “learned” that you only get hurt when you risk. Love and give and risk because of who it makes you. When you love in spite of being hurt you learn to love in a deeper way. When you give in spite of there being no chance of your gift being reciprocated you experience the intrinsic joy of giving. When you risk with no assurance of success, you experience the exhilaration of life that only comes from risk and doing something that you are scared to do.

So happy new year! Choose to make it the most loving, most giving, most exciting year that you have ever chosen to have.

One step past where you stop is your success.

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A talented  trainer from Minus Zero Trainings and good friend of mine named Thinh was sharing with me what he noticed about himself and I thought, “That is me too!” He said, “Notice where you stop. That is where you have placed your own limitations.”

So, where do you stop?

How many times do you ask for what you want before you tell yourself to stop by saying, “I don’t want to bother them (be rude, pushy, needy, etc.).”

Where do you stop?

How many times to you try to accomplish your goals and dreams before you quit with an excuse like, “This is just not for me”, “I just can’t do it”, “I can’t look that foolish“, “The economy is too bad for this”, or “I just don’t know the right people”, “If I was like that other guy I could, but…”

Where do you stop?

Notice those around you that seem to succeed more then you. Notice how they make requests and repeatedly attempt their goals again and again. Pay special attention to the things they say and do that make you cringe. What do they do that you would “never” do, because it is too risky or un-calculated? What do they say that you would “never” say, because it is too rude or pushy?

If this resonates with you, try being a bit more rude, pushy and risky. Notice where stop and try going a bit further. It just might work out for you.

Why & How Affirmations Work

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I am so thankful to easily and effortlessly make $100,000 a month speaking and training others to reach their own sales and profit goals.

Beliefs get made in 3 primarily ways

  1. Adolescent Messages: What you were told when you were a kid
  2. Emotionally Charged Ideas: Thoughts that you accepted during highly emotionally charged events. (An example many of us wrestle with is: you get betrayed by a loved one and the betrayal becomes known all at once, like during a fight. Maybe the loved one yells, “you are not worth my love!” Because of the emotionally charged situation that thought makes it into the subconscious that you are not worth being loved. Now you reject signs of love from others because its obviously not real because you believe you are not worth love. So obviously this thing being offered isn’t love.
  3. Repetition. Any idea you tell yourself or allow yourself to hear will eventually be accepted as true. Your brain will let it pass to the subconscious and will then repeat it over and over for you without any further conscious effort.

We usually define beliefs as “How it is” or “how things are” or “this is just how I am”. Some examples of this are, “I am just not good with people” or “I am just not good at speaking to groups of people” or “the world is a dangerous place.” These are all belief driven, not reality driven statements. As in, our beliefs give meaning to a citation. You can’t be good or bad at anything unless you define the whole scenario through your beliefs. This is good news! This means you can change your beliefs if they aren’t working for you.

These affirmations work when you make the idea that you would like to be true and then intentionally repeating that idea.  Next you get yourself to feel the positive emotions that will come from attaining the idea by imagining it to be happening. This combination of repetition and feeling the desired emotion literally guides you to unconsciously alter the small habits that you are unaware of.

The real key here is just that you use your designed belief. As you use it every day you will be able to tweek it so it sounds better to you and evokes the positive emotions.

Say it to yourself when you get up and when you got to bed. That way your mind starts the day focusing on what you want and ends the day focusing on it too so you can dream and work on it while you sleep.

3 Steps To Keep Momentum and Win In Life

Creating the Unprecedented, Increase Performance, Self Development0 comments

In the thousands of hours of coaching over the years, I have found these 3 steps will help you keep the momentum and finish strong on your journey in your best life ever. They are simple, yet profound.
1. Recognize where and how you are doing good right now. Celebrate that.
2. Focus on your goals
3. Remind yourself of who you choose to be and then change your behavior in this moment so that you are acting like it.
Step One:
Recognize that you are winning and Celebrate!
It is in the state of exhilaration that challenges are overcome and new creation happens. To get exhilarated you just need to stop and recognize everything in your life that is great. I promise its there if you look hard enough.
So, take a deep breath in…. then out… and allow yourself to recognize that you are doing great.
You went to Trotter’s workshop. You hired a coach. You are doing the work. you have that list of be, do, have’s and your top five accomplishments. Tell yourself “great job, you are awesome and on your way!” and mean it.

Step Two:
Focus on your goals! You need to have your exact goal in mind when you wake up. You need to have your goal in mind when you go to sleep too. You need to have beliefs about yourself that help you do what it takes. Too many beliefs that we tell ourselves influence us to quit. If you think different thoughts about yourself you will act and feel differently.
In case you haven’t done much work on exactly what you want to do, or who you want to be, here is a helpful exercise to get clear.
Write out 30 characteristics that you want to BE, 30 things you want to DO, and 30 things you want to HAVE.
  1. BE’s. Think of all the people you admire. Real or fiction. Dead or alive. What are the characteristics that they possess that attract you? Brave, confident, loving, creative, perceptive, smart, persistent, hard working, revolutionary, etc… Write the characteristics ‘you would like to be’ down till you have 30 of them. You start to design your own beliefs by changing the “I would like to be” with “I am”. Instead of “I would like to be intentional”, now it is “I am intentional”. Instead of “I would like to be adventurous” say “I am adventurous”. Choose to be that in this moment! Declare it and then ask, “What would I do if I was adventurous and intentional in this moment?” And then do that. This is how you create yourself to be how you wish you were. 🙂 The more you remind yourself who you would like to be and act accordingly (even if you don’t feel like it!) the more natural it will become. Then one day, you get told, “I wish I was as adventurous as you, but that is just your personality, I can’t be like you.” Then you will laugh and know how far you’ve come.
  2. For your DO’s and HAVE’s. Go down each of them and write a 1, 5, or a 10 to the right of them. These are one, five and ten year goals. If you think it will take a year or less, put a one. Five or less, put a five. More then Five, put a ten. Then while BEING the woman in you have chosen, go after year one goals!
Step Three:
Remind yourself often that you are able and will accomplish your goal! Allow yourself to imagine the accomplishment of your dreams. Feel how good that will be. If you repeat this process when you get up and when you go to bed, this alone will change your life. I promise. The thing about it is that it’s too easy to do. Becuase it is easy to do, its also easy NOT to do. So, don’t get caught up on how simple this sounds. JUST DO IT! Again, I promise this will revolutionize your life.
This process is called belief design. The purpose of designing a belief is to support you and equip you to engage in your life so that you get what you want. You are creating new thought patterns that promote new actions that give you a better life then you have had in the past. It all starts with your thinking.
I wrote an article with this in mind. Use the link below to get to the post to read it and create your affirmation that will support you in your chosen path.

These things are easy to do and easy not to do. Remember all the ways you are doing great. Nothing and no one can stop you from having the life you want, save you. I am excited to be a part of you getting there. Feel free to contact me for the free consultation to see how Perra Consulting Group can support you to get you where you want to go.

The “right” choice in fear is the “wrong” choice

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Any choice, even if its the “right” one, if based in fear, I say is the “wrong” choice.
Let’s say you are positive and really do know the “right” choice to make. If that decision is motivated by any sort of fear, the way that you interact with the world and everyone in it while you are in that fearful and scarce place will just produce the very thing you are trying to get away from! Acting out of fear, results in ruining the good and right thing we were trying set out to do.
Let’s take a high school relationship example. I remember a time when I still wanted to be with “the girl” and she no longer wanted to be with me. I responded to this supposed rejection with a fear induced appearance of love. It looked like doing nice things for her and promising a different future in hopes of changing her feelings of no longer wanting that future with me. My supposed love, was really just acts of control because I feared losing her.
The fear based attempt to force love will only produce more resistance from the other person. In my story, it might look like a girl filing a restraining order! This concept might be harder to identify in everyday life scenarios.
Maybe these will be more familiar:
  • Stay in abusive or draining relationships solely because we believe we can’t do better and would hate to be alone.
  • Continue to do what you have always done, even though you just barely tolerate what you do. The fear of facing the unknown and going for what you really want is far more painful then the life you tolerate.
  • Begrudgingly  staying in a role that limits who you want to be, because of your fear of rejection or disappointing a loved one. (This is common with parents, spouses or anyone who has known your past, and for the sake of keeping their own role in tact, they try to keep you where you have been.)

As humans we have two primary decision making filters. One is primary of the other. We make decisions to:

  1. Move away from what we don’t want (fear, scarcity)
  2. Move toward what we do want (abundance).

Most people tend to do make most decisions based on the first. Again, the problem of this fearful way of keeping your life together, is that you end up becoming a person that ends up messing up even good decisions!

There is a better way to live. Put your energy into what you do want, in your goals, in your dreams. Keep your focus there and watch how your life and opportunity opens up for you. I have a simple way to keep your focus on what you want, instead of what you don’t want. Before acting, carefully consider your response to both of these two questions.

  1. What would I do right now if I wasn’t afraid?
  2. Is this action moving towards my goals?

If the answer is moving towards  your goal, do it!

This of course presupposes you have clear goals. You do have clear goals right? Right!??

Bound To Succeed

Creating the Unprecedented, Getting What You Want Insight, Self Development0 comments

There was once a young leader seeking the council of a famous elder that was known for wisdom and creativity and leadership. The young leader traveled far and finally stood before him. He asked, “Wise elder, how can I become the wise leader that you are?” The elder quickly said, “Making right decisions” and then was silent. After a short while of enduring the silence, surprised that there was nothing more, the young leader pressed a bit more. “Ok… thank you… Please help me wise elder, how can one such as I then make right decisions?” The elder quickly said, “Experience” and then was silent.” After another short while of enduring the silence again, needing much more, the young leader started to get frustrated and pressed again. “Please wise elder, please help me. How can one such as I get experience then?!” The elder quickly said, “Making bad decisions.”

What stops us most in life is when we stop trying for fear of making bad decisions or making a bad decision “again”. Ironically, this very process, if stayed in it, would bring you all that you have ever hoped life would give you.
So what do you want? Get clear on that. Fail forward and you are bound to succeed.

“Drift, Wait and Obey”

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“I drift, wait and obey” – Harold Arlen

Harold Arlen is the composer who was charged to write the score for the classic movie The Wizard of Oz. He wrote every piece of music for the movie and was very pleased with his work. Yet he knew there was still the one song that would pull the whole experience together. He knew it wouldn’t be complete without that one song, yet was a blank. Instead of resisting and being frustrated about his lack of creativity for this most pivotal part, he decided to do what may seem like the last thing he should do. He went on a date with his wife. He stepped away and decided to enjoy his lunch time. On way home a burst of inspiration came over him and he told his wife to pull over from driving. He quickly scribbled out whole song on scrap paper. The song was “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”. And it did make the whole movie come together.

Insight comes from waiting silently in the space of not knowing.

Don’t resist. Don’t even resist not resisting. Go and be open to the best answer you would have missed if you stayed distraught about not having the “right” answer! Or in the light of Harold’s quote, when you have a problem that you do not have a solution for, allow yourself to drift and wait and when the answer comes, obey.